After a long day of work, the last thing you want is for your wife to shoot you down when you try to initiate intimacy.
But sometimes, despite your best efforts, she just isn’t feeling it. If your wife is often not in the mood for sex, it can be a major source of friction in your relationship.
Luckily, there are a few things you can do to increase the chances that she’ll be receptive when you make a move. Read on for five ways to get your wife in the mood.
Also Read: How To Get Your Husband’s Attention
1. Talk about what she wants in bed.
If you’re not sure what turns your wife on, ask her! Talk about what kinds of things she likes during sex.
This will not only help her feel more comfortable and open with you, but it will also give you a better sense of how to please her. Plus, simply talking about sex can sometimes be enough to get her in the mood.
EXPERT TIP: “When you talk with her, discuss ways to build up intimacy. It’s not just about penetrative sex. It’s about the journey to get there. How can you create anticipation? Perhaps you suggest a bath or getting into a hot tub naked together. You could suggest making out for a while or making out as the main course of action.
Often times, women feel as though foreplay is missed or forgotten. By foreplay, I don’t mean oral sex. I mean little kisses you share throughout the day. It means complimenting her and telling her how she means to you. Foreplay is the way you show your interest and excitement for your partner. Foreplay can be a playful banter about a topic you both enjoy. Couples who engage in foreplay all day, most days, tend to enjoy sex more with each other because they are maintaining their erotic connection.” – Angela Skurtu founder of St. Louis Marriage Therapy, LLC
2. Plan a date night.
Sometimes, all it takes to get your wife in the mood is some quality time together outside of the bedroom.
Plan a special date night and focus on being present with each other without any distractions.
This will help you reconnect and may even lead to some romantic moments before you even make it home for the main event.
EXPERT TIP: “Treat the date as though you are courting your partner. Pick a place you know she likes. Dress a little sexier and put on some cologne. Open doors for her or offer your arm for her to hold. Many women do enjoy being treated like they are special.”-Angela Skurtu
3. Do something nice for her during the day.
A little act of kindness can go a long way towards getting your wife in the mood for sex later on.
Whether it’s making her breakfast in bed, taking care of the kids so she can have some time to herself, or simply telling her how much you love her, doing something sweet will show her that you care and may just put her in a sexy mood come bedtime.
4. Send her a flirty text during the day.
A little sexting never hurt anyone! Sending your wife a naughty text message during the day can be a great way to get her thinking about you and eager for more when you finally see each other at night.
5. Make time for sexual foreplay.
Don’t just go straight for the obvious when you’re trying to get your wife in the mood—sometimes, foreplay is key!
Take some time to make out or give each other massages before getting down to business. This will help both of you feel relaxed and turned on, setting the stage for an enjoyable experience for both of you!
EXPERT TIPS: “Think of warming the whole body and taking your time. You don’t start at 50. Start with low-level touches that build warmth and connection. Start with non-sexual touches and then build into more sexual touch. Her whole body is full of nerve endings to play with.”
Initiating intimacy with your wife doesn’t have to be difficult or awkward—there are plenty of things you can do to increase the chances that she’ll be receptive when you make a move (and trust us, she’ll appreciate it). So next time you’re feeling frisky, try one of these five tips and see where things go!